
Marilyn Manson, a.k.a. Brian Warner, the self-proclaimed Satan-
The shameless self-purveyor rumored to be a goat-raper is actually a Bible-thumping Jehovah's Witness who has helped convert tens of thousands of Catholics, Methodists and Baptists, and is already on his way to hitting the 500,000 mark.
The ghoulish-looking singer was recently spotted at a Jehovah's Witness service held at the Greatest Kingdom Hall Ever Made in Lexington, Kentucky. The service was in preparation for the annual Jehovah's Witness Recognition Ceremony, where hundreds of hardworking and loyal Jehovah's Witnesses are honored for their excellence in usurping believers from other faiths.
Manson will be given the distinguished Kingdom Hall Achievement Award for his exemplary performance. He was responsible for converting nearly 45,000 people, mostly teenagers, in the state of New Jersey alone. He has been busy with his outreach in the last twelve months during which the singer was hard at work promoting his latest CD, "Anti-Christ Superstar."
Jehovah's Witnesses all over the world are adamantly denying that Manson is a fellow faith freak. Pamela Godworthy, a well-known community leader in Wyoming, has issued an official press statement to clear the issue.
"We would like to make it clear to all that Marilyn Manson has no place in our church. He is a spawn of the fiery flames of Sheol. We are God's children.", Godworthy said.
Industry insiders are not buying Godworthy's story. They believe that Manson is indeed a Jehovah's Witness and is using his "Anti-Christ superstardom" to advance the faith.
"Marilyn Manson is nothing but a wannabe shock rocker who is shamelessly ransacking the vast dark realm brought to life by such pioneers as Alice Cooper and Trent Reznor... all to serve Jehovah," said David Covenant, who writes for the underground magazine Uranium.
According to Covenant, Marilyn Manson is transmitting subliminal Biblical passages through his hellbending music. The song "Beautiful People," for instance, is actually chock full of verses from the gospel of John. "Sweet Dreams, " his remake of the classic Eurythmics song, was meticulously constructed and sheathed with passages from the Ecclesiastes. Manson employs the old "play-it-backwards" trick dating back to the days of KISS, only this time God-praising, instead of Satanic, messages are being conveyed. Covenant says this is the only way Manson could perform his faith outreach.
"There is no way he could distribute The Watchtower openly to his fans. He cannot possibly risk being found out. There is too much church money at stake," said Covenant.
"I cannot believe how far he's gone without being detected," adds Covenant, "His fans need to know that when they buy his CDs and merchandise or go to his concerts, they are actually supporting the same people they have turned away at their door many, many times. He is a liar, a big liar. It is absolutely sickening."
Marilyn Manson could not be reached for comment as of press time. The singer is still on tour with his band, and will be going back to the studio soon to record his follow-up to the platinum-selling "Anti-Christ Superstar."
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This story is a complete fabrication. Shame on you who ever wrote this story putting Jehovahs holy name in this awful mess. First of all Jehovahs wittnesess dont have recognition awards and second of all Jehovahs wittnesses are christian and the foundation is built around Jesus Christ not the antichrist. Do the research for yourself and read John 3:16 Jehovah loved the world so much he gave his only begotten son so whosoever believes in him will have everlasting life. The foundation of christianity is through Christ and not antichrist superstar! Jehovahs wittnesses go totally by the bible. IF you dont belive me go to a kingdom Hall yourself or just ask a true wittness when they go door to door. Its amazing how people dont do research and put garbage like this for dumb unimformed people to read.
I did not mean to say dumb but just unimformed. Jehovahs wittnesses are NOT satan worshipers. That is the biggest lie that has went around for years and it should be put to rest! Jehovahs wittnesses preach about the kingdom of god, morals and jesus christ check this out and see for yourself its not cover up its the real deal! http://www.watchtower.org/
“… However, they and all others who are resurrected, as well as the great crowd of faithful other sheep who survive Armageddon and any children that may be born to these in the new world, must yet be raised to human perfection…” — Revelation—Its Grand Climax at Hand!, Chapter 40 – Crushing the Serpents Head, paragraph 15
As Jehovah’s Witnesses we were taught that the resurrected could not get married or have children but the ones who survived armaggeddon would be allowed to marry and could even have children in the new system. That doesn’t seem fair. I mean here’s all these couples getting it on after surviving armaggeddon and the poor resurrected people aren’t even allowed to masturbate! Will they even have breasts and genitals? Why have them if they can’t use them.
the resurrected will not want to use their breast and genitals because they will be totally devoted to praise and worship and communion with our Lord Jesus Christ.Their bodies will also be different than the present ones. The Armaggeddon survivers`s weddings will certainly be different and more pure.I also think their children will obviously be brought up in a more holy way. They will have to be given a chance to differentiate between good and evil. How can one know the good if one cannot see the evil.
Think some people are just the followers of Satan’s system of things that are happening here on earth so therefore whoever is making such character assassination of Jehovah’s witlessness is not by his will but Satan’s will coz he Satan is known to be doomed so therefore are his followers for if Jesus was said to belong to Beelzebub why not the witnesses to be ridiculed? instead let them go a head preaching the gospel for the kingdom is just the other corner.