14 Nov 2018

Transgender artist out of ideas to subvert social constructs

Coupon, Pennsylvania — Local visual and musical artist and self-professed cultural dissident Valerie Sanders has run out of ways to express herself and grab attention in the fast-paced era of social media driven by the constant fear of missing out.

Sunny Ho 0 Read More
12 Sep 2018

AARP slams Machine Gun Kelly for ‘abuse of elderly’ over Eminem diss track

Washington, D.C. — The AARP (formerly American Association of Retired Persons) has issued a scathing rebuke of Cleveland rapper Machine Gun Kelly for releasing his Eminem diss track “Rap Devil,” calling it “abuse of the elderly.”

Wanda JK Orselens 0 Read More
04 Sep 2018

Brett Kavanaugh: ‘I thought Guttenberg was my gay stalker from college’

Conservative U.S. Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh has broken his silence on why he turned his back on the father of a dead teen shooting victim during a break at his confirmation hearing Tuesday.

In a press conference shortly after the hearing had adjourned for the day, Kavanaugh told reporters he thought Fred Guttenberg, the father of Parkland teen Jamie Guttenberg, was a former gay acquaintance from college with whom he had a destructive and traumatic history.

Marcia Mallow 0 Read More
10 Jun 2018

Spray tan rubs off from Trump’s hand after aggressive handshake with French President Macron

La Malbaie, Quebec — Dreamy French President Emmanuel Macron accidentally rubbed off spray tan from orange tinted Kremlin kowtower Dotard Trump’s hand following an aggressively firm handshake at the G7 Summit in Canada.

Benderson Hoover 0 Read More
01 Apr 2018

Lady Gaga, Trump dominate 3rd Annual Fishies

Parkland, FL — Failed pop star and convenient pain sufferer Lady Gaga and rude White House occupant Dotard J. Trump were the big winners at the Third Annual Fishy Awards held Sunday in the iconic international foods aisle of the Parkland Commons Publix on N University Dr.

Bent Spud Staff 0 Read More