05 Feb 2017

Black Lives Matter protests Super Bowl, demands US$1 billion in reparations for ‘wronged’ Janet Jackson

Houston, TX — Black Lives Matter protesters have organized a surprise rally in Houston today to protest the “racist patriarchy” of the Super Bowl and demand that reparations be made to Janet Jackson, whose career was destroyed after the 2004 “Nipplegate” halftime show scandal.

Sojourner Delilah Roughwood 0 Read More
18 Jan 2017

Prostitutes protest Donald Trump by refusing ‘pee-pee parties’

Washington, D.C. — If you’re in America looking for a prostitute to urinate on (or be urinated on by) for sexual pleasure, you’re out of luck.

Marcia Mallow 0 Read More
13 Jan 2017

Accounts Receivable clerk insists invoice requests ‘not AR’

Climax, MN — Longtime Accounts Receivable clerk Joyce Boyle shocked colleagues Friday after she insisted that invoice requests are “not AR.”

Boyle, 47, made the explosive claim in an email response to a coworker who had sent a request for an invoice to a general email address set up for the Accounts Receivable department of Abernathy Beauty Supplies, Inc., a small Minnesota firm distributing low-cost beauty products.

Eros Giancarlo Gucci 0 Read More
31 Dec 2016

The 21 Songs That Rocked 2016

It’s undeniable that 2016 was a terrible year all around. So many great musicians passed away. Icons like David Bowie, Prince and Leonard Cohen. All taken too soon. And then there’s the matter of *cough* Donald Trump *cough*. But let’s not get into that and ruin our spirit. Instead, let’s look back at the songs that made the last 365 days at least somewhat bearable.

Bent Spud Staff 0 Read More
20 Dec 2016

Melania Trump as First Lady to champion struggling Eastern European models looking for their own Donald Trump

Manhattan, New York — First Lady-in-waiting Melania Trump has promised to be the champion and the voice of struggling, hard up Eastern European models chasing the American dream and looking for their own Donald Trump when her husband takes office as the 45th President of the United States of America.

Marcia Mallow 0 Read More