12 Apr 2017

Man dragged from overbooked United flight scores floor care advertising deal

The man who was filmed in a viral video being roughed up and dragged off an overbooked United flight has secured an advertising contract with American household consumer chemicals giant S.C. Johnson & Son.

Eros Giancarlo Gucci 0 Read More
01 Apr 2017

Lady Gaga picks up six trophies at 2nd Fishy Awards

Las Vegas, NV — Failed pop star and Golden Globe Award procurement specialist Lady Gaga cleaned up at the Second Annual Fishy Awards held Saturday in the feminine hygiene aisle of the CVS on Las Vegas Blvd.

Bent Spud Staff 0 Read More
05 Feb 2017

Black Lives Matter protests Super Bowl, demands US$1 billion in reparations for ‘wronged’ Janet Jackson

Houston, TX — Black Lives Matter protesters have organized a surprise rally in Houston today to protest the “racist patriarchy” of the Super Bowl and demand that reparations be made to Janet Jackson, whose career was destroyed after the 2004 “Nipplegate” halftime show scandal.

Sojourner Delilah Roughwood 0 Read More
18 Jan 2017

Prostitutes protest Donald Trump by refusing ‘pee-pee parties’

Washington, D.C. — If you’re in America looking for a prostitute to urinate on (or be urinated on by) for sexual pleasure, you’re out of luck.

Marcia Mallow 0 Read More
13 Jan 2017

Accounts Receivable clerk insists invoice requests ‘not AR’

Climax, MN — Longtime Accounts Receivable clerk Joyce Boyle shocked colleagues Friday after she insisted that invoice requests are “not AR.”

Boyle, 47, made the explosive claim in an email response to a coworker who had sent a request for an invoice to a general email address set up for the Accounts Receivable department of Abernathy Beauty Supplies, Inc., a small Minnesota firm distributing low-cost beauty products.

Eros Giancarlo Gucci 0 Read More