27 Nov 2016

Kellyanne Conway 27 Dalmatian puppies away from completing prized fur coat

Bedminster, New Jersey — Full time Donald Trump surrogate and occasional New Jersey mom Kellyanne Conway has stepped up efforts to complete her prized fur coat, which only needs about 27 more Dalmatian puppies, much to the consternation of animal rights activists everywhere.

Sojourner D. Roughwood 0 Read More
02 Mar 2016

Economic inequality to blame for Zika outbreak, says Bernie Sanders

Gas, KS — U.S. presidential aspirant Bernie Sanders believes the current Zika virus outbreak would not have happened “if there was no economic inequality in the world.”

Marcia Mallow 0 Read More
09 Feb 2016

Area man realizes boneless chicken wings ‘basically just chicken nuggets’

Portland, OR — A Goose Hollow resident is mildly irritated after realizing the boneless chicken wings he ordered for dinner from his local Wingstop were “basically just chicken nuggets slathered in spicy Buffalo sauce.”

Diana Rosenbaum 0 Read More
13 Jun 2015

Racial identity disorder is real, says leading psychologist

Boston, MA — Racial identity disorder – otherwise known as racial dysphoria – is a real and valid condition affecting millions of Americans and it is time that it is acknowledged as such, a leading psychologist and expert on racial identity issues has claimed.

Atiq Roshan 3 Read More
24 Jan 2015

High school jock ostracized for listening to Meghan Trainor

Kooskia, Idaho — By all accounts, Josh Tills should be having the time of his life at the top of the popularity chain. Seventeen years old. Quarterback position on the high school football team. Good looks with a brain to match. Everything a teenaged boy could ever hope for.

Wanda JK Orselens 0 Read More