28 Jun 2017

Americans appalled by Trump presidency turn to cryonics for escape

More and more Americans embarrassed by the incompetence and disgracefulness of Donald Trump’s presidency have turned to or are seriously considering temporary cryonic suspension to escape the unbearable political climate in America.

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04 Feb 2011

Prehistoric vegetarians, vegans ‘probably got eaten by predators,’ says expert

London, UK — Vegetarians and vegans existed in prehistoric times, but there is no present-day evidence of their existence because they most likely got eaten by carnivorous predators before they could leave a lasting mark on the world, a leading British archaeologist has claimed.

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19 May 2010

High schoolers power miniature engine with ‘teen grease’

Houston, TX — A miniature internal combustion engine fueled by excess teenage facial oils has won the blue ribbon at Lamar High School’s 53rd Annual Science Fair.

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01 Dec 2009

Fat-eating worms offer hope for obesity sufferers

Cuiabá, Brazil — Health and nutrition experts worldwide are hailing the discovery in the Amazon Rainforest of a new species of parasitic worms that thrive on animal adipose tissue, saying they could potentially revolutionize the fight against obesity in humans.

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08 Nov 2009

New computer virus sends overly Christian emails

Redmond, WA — A brand new computer virus called “God RuleZ” has started making its way through the Internet today, but Microsoft Corporation network security specialists say there is absolutely nothing to worry about.

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