Twitter rejection drives woman to nervous breakdown

Binningham: Pre-Twitter, happier

Cockintake, Staffordshire, UK — A Staffordshire woman is in hospital after suffering a nervous breakdown brought on by people removing her from their follow lists on popular social networking site Twitter.

Linda Binningham, 38, was admitted to Cannock Chase Hospital last night and is presently under a suicide watch. She was found unconscious and frothing at the mouth, next to her laptop and an empty bottle of menstrual pain relief pills.

Binningham’s husband, Martin Browstock, also 38, said his wife became “rather obsessed” with Twitter in the past few months, during which she racked up over a thousand followers. “I don’t know how she found all those people,” he marveled.

Browstock didn’t think much of his wife’s newfound online hobby until recently, when Binningham started displaying moody behaviour and would stay up all night reading everyone’s Twitter updates. There were days when she was too tired and sleepy to go to work.

“All she could talk about lately was how she was losing followers on Twitter, and how those people were being mean to her,” said Browstock. “That should’ve been my alarm call.”

Doctors are expecting Binningham to make a full recovery from her drug overdose, and will likely recommend a commitment to an asylum where she can be monitored, weaned off of Twitter and eventually rehabilitated using electroconvulsive therapy.

“The only way for her to unlearn this obsession with Twitter is by sending bolts of electricity through her brain every time she sees a blue bird. It will be a slow process, but we are confident she will emerge victorious and clean,” said Dr. Barry Mandrake, Binningham’s attending physician.

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